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Writer's pictureMindful Process

Perimenopause: What is Happening to Me?

The question "What is happening to me?" is one that many women ask themselves during the transition to perimenopause. It’s a stage in life that can feel overwhelming and confusing, as the body goes through a series of changes that can affect not only physical health but also mental and emotional well-being. Many women are left feeling as though they’ve lost control or don't know how to navigate the complex experience of perimenopause. This in-depth look at perimenopause, its effects on mental health, and how it impacts those around us will help shed light on this important stage of life.


What is Perimenopause?

Perimenopause is the transitional phase leading up to menopause, typically occurring between your late 30s and mid-50s. It can last anywhere from a few months to over a decade. During this time, your ovaries gradually produce less oestrogen, causing hormonal fluctuations that result in physical and emotional changes.

Common symptoms include:

  • Irregular periods

  • Hot flushes and night sweats

  • Insomnia

  • Fatigue

  • Mood swings

  • Changes in libido

While these physical symptoms are well-documented, the mental health implications often remain in the shadows, leaving many women feeling misunderstood or unsupported.


Mental Health and Perimenopause

The hormonal rollercoaster of perimenopause affects brain chemistry, particularly levels of serotonin—a key player in mood regulation. As a result, many women experience symptoms such as:

  • Anxiety

  • Depression

  • Irritability

  • Forgetfulness or "brain fog"

These changes can be bewildering. You might find yourself snapping at loved ones, doubting your abilities at work, or feeling a profound sense of sadness without understanding why.


The Science Behind It

Hormonal fluctuations during perimenopause can affect:

  1. Serotonin Levels: Lower oestrogen can lead to reduced serotonin, often resulting in mood instability and anxiety.

  2. Cortisol Response: Increased sensitivity to stress can make life’s daily challenges feel overwhelming.

  3. Sleep Disruption: Insomnia, often due to night sweats or anxiety, exacerbates mood changes and fatigue.

A recent study by the UK-based Mental Health Foundation revealed that up to 61% of women in perimenopause experience anxiety or depressive symptoms, many for the first time in their lives.


The Ripple Effect: Impacts on Relationships

Perimenopause doesn’t happen in isolation—it affects those around us too. Partners, children, friends, and colleagues might notice changes but struggle to understand them.

  • At Home: Mood swings and irritability can create tension with loved ones. Explaining the changes to your family and seeking support can help build understanding and empathy.

  • At Work: Brain fog or emotional sensitivity may make you feel less confident. Open communication with employers and colleagues can foster a supportive work environment.

  • In Friendships: Feeling low or misunderstood might lead to social withdrawal, but maintaining connections is crucial for mental health.


Coping Strategies for Perimenopause and Mental Health

1. Seek Professional Help

If mood swings, anxiety, or depression are affecting your daily life, consult a GP or menopause specialist. They may recommend:

  • Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT): To balance oestrogen levels.

  • Counselling or CBT: Cognitive Behavioural Therapy can help manage mood changes.

  • Medication: Antidepressants might be an option for severe symptoms.


2. Build a Support Network

Talking about perimenopause can reduce stigma and isolation. Join online forums or local support groups where you can connect with others going through similar experiences. Organisations like Menopause Support UK and The Daisy Network offer resources and advice.


3. Prioritise Self-Care

  • Exercise: Regular activity improves mood and reduces stress.

  • Nutrition: A diet rich in omega-3s, whole grains, and leafy greens supports brain health.

  • Sleep Hygiene: Create a calming bedtime routine to combat insomnia.

  • Mindfulness and Relaxation: Yoga and meditation can ease stress and anxiety.


4. Communicate Openly

Let your family, friends, and colleagues know how you’re feeling. Sharing your experiences can build understanding and strengthen relationships.


Changing the Conversation

For too long, perimenopause has been a taboo topic, leaving many women to suffer in silence. In recent years, UK campaigns like Menopause Matters have helped raise awareness. Celebrities such as Davina McCall have spoken openly about their experiences, sparking important conversations.

We need to continue normalising discussions about perimenopause and mental health to ensure women receive the support they deserve.


You Are Not Alone

It’s important to remember that perimenopause is a natural stage of life—one that comes with challenges but also an opportunity for growth. By understanding the changes in your body and mind, seeking help when needed, and leaning on your support network, you can navigate this journey with resilience.

If you’re reading this and feeling overwhelmed, take heart: You’re not alone, and brighter days lie ahead. Reach out, talk about it, and take the first step towards reclaiming your mental and emotional well-being.


Resources for Support in the UK:

Together, we can shift the narrative from “What is happening to me?” to “I’ve got this.”

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